What's the deal?

I think I actually hate him.

5 months

My taxes should have been filed by April 2009. It is now September 2009 and they're still not done. Renvenue Canada is now bugging me and threatening to make me pay money back. I better do them even though my income is $0.

Bastards.

Dough Head move #5,648,322

Dough Head, AKA The Nemesis, had friends over. It is painful enough to have him home let alone HIS company.

So, to make a long, boring story short this is it: Dick Head decides to make breakfast for his cronies on Sunday morning. He has four people over at our house. He proceeds to make pancakes and bacon. My daughter and I come downstairs to join in and they're all sitting at my table having a lovely old breakfast. I walk into the kitchen to get my pancake and there is NOTHING there. He didn't make enough food for my daughter and I.

I usually do the cooking in our house, however, because he had so many people over I told him he could do the cooking this weekend. I have never, ever, ever omitted him from a meal. If I have friends over I cook for all of us. I include everyone. I make sure there is enough food for him, the kids, the guests, and myself. If, for some reason, there wasn't enough pancake batter to go around, I would serve everyone up and whip up another batch and eat last.

What a fuck wad. How insulting, rude, humiliating and disrepectful. I said "where's the pancakes?" He said "there wasn't enough for you and youngest child." I said "Oh, you cooked for everyone and excluded us?" Then he starts taking pancakes off of his guests plates and things went from bad to worse. Then he accused me of making the guests feel uncomfortable and bad. WHAT A DICK.

ANYWAY... what an asshole. That's it.

Fuck that...

I think I hate most people. I find them fucking irritating and full of shit. How come it is so hard to find genuine people?

Mystery of house guest - No. 2

Mystery number two starts off the same way as mystery number one. Mr. Guest, same person, arrives for an unexpected visit with us. Mr Guest always has his friggin little yappy dog with him. I can't stand the dog. Mr Guest loves his dog. Let me just add that Mr Guest is about 6'2" and weighs about 350lbs and his dog is like a chihuahua. He picks up this little yapper and walks around talking to it in baby talk. Very annoying.

ANYWAY, Mr Guest arrives with his dog. He lets the dog run wild around our house, He lets the dog jump all over the furniture and, to top things off, the dog barks at everything that moves. I had had enough. He's in the kitchen (we don't let our own dogs in the kitchen) with this little bastard dog and the fucking dog is barking at me. I decided to put an end to that. I, like the dog whisperer that I am, decided to show the dog that this is my house and I am the king (or queen) of this abode. I stood up tall and every time the little bastard barked I nipped it with my foot. It wasn't a full blown kick just enough to say shut up. Guess what? The dog shut up (for a bit until Mr Guest decided to pick it up and get it out of my reach). So, the long and the short of it is that Mr Guest encourages this behaviour and lets the dog run the show at his house.

I couldn't wait for Mr Guest to take his dog and leave. The next morning Mr Guest gets up and jumps in the shower (as described in No. 1). Not a problem. The problem started after he had used my facial mitt to wash his ass and came out to have a coffee (which I made the Nemesis get for him). The Nemesis goes to get Mr Guest a coffee and what does that little fucking yappy dog start doing? Barking - repeatedly. It's 5:30am, my daughter has been sick all night with a fever and puking and fuckhead lets his dog start barking and he thinks it's cute. I yelled "Mr Guest, shut that fucking dog up." Too late, it had already woken my daughter up. Mr Guest says "she only barked three times." I said "bullshit, she barked more than that and she woke up daughter." Mr Guest proceeded to pick up the yappy dog and walk around the house with him - again.

HELPFUL HINT #2 IF YOU ARE EVER A HOUSE GUEST:- If you bring your dog to someone's house, don't let the little fucker run wild and jump all over the furniture and don't let it bark over and over and over again at 5:30am. If you can't control your dog, don't bring it.

Mysteries of the household guest - No. 1

We had a house guest the other night. I have to tell you though, I really don't know what goes through some peoples' minds. There were a number of puzzling incidents and this guest only stayed one night. Could you imagine if we had to spend a prolonged period of time with him? Then again, we have had other puzzling guests so I can only blame this on their association with the Nemesis.

Mr Guest arrives the other night with the Nemesis. It's nice to see Mr Guest once in a while. To be honest with you though, I really don't like to have guests too often unless they are my own. If they are the Nemesis' guests I want them in and out as quickly as possible. Anyway, Mr Guest arrives. He didn't know he was going to be staying the night so he hadn't brought anything with him. I managed to find him a toothbrush and just assumed, as it is a close person to the Nemesis, that the Nemesis would see to the rest of his needs. Mr Guest awoke at 5:30am. I didn't have a problem with that because I was awake already. Mr Guest then jumps in the shower. I didn't have a problem with this either especially since he didn't have a spare set of clothes and, because of his size, nothing of ours would come close to fitting him. So shower away Mr Guest.

The problem began when I went in the bathroom after the Nemesis and Mr Guest had left. In the shower that Mr Guest was using I have this little hand mitt which I put on my right hand almost everyday. On this hand mitt I place a bit of cleanser and then lightly scrub my face with it to exfoliate. I then hang up my hand mitt after washing it out so it can dry for the same ritual the next morning. Well, after the Nemesis and Mr Guest left I went into the bathroom and what do I see? I see my hand mitt all bunched up in a wet little ball right beside the soap. Why was my hand mitt not in its usual spot? Why was my hand mitt wet and in a ball by the soap? Who touched my hand mitt? What am I supposed to assume? The only answer I have to this is that Mr Guest decided to use this little hand mitt to wash HIS body with. For all I know, Mr Guest took my facial hand mitt rubbed it all over the soap and then proceeded to scrub his big hairy ass with it. What am I supposed to think happened with it? No one in my family touches my hand mitt. Why would they, it`s not theirs. The hand mitt is never out of place. NEVER. The PINK hand mitt is mine. It`s pink it`s not supposed to be used to scrub out someone`s butt with. For fuck`s sake, why didn`t he just use my fancy $125 sonic care tooth brush and clean his toenails? Better yet, why didn`t he just use my toothbrush to brush his own mangy mouth?


I`m so traumatized by this event that I am now going to put on my little rubber gloves, grab my hand mitt and proceed to the garbage. Who cares if I paid $25 for the hand mitt? Obviously, Mr Guest doesn`t give a shit.

Can I just spare you the shame if you are ever a house guest. Please, if you didn`t bring your own hand mitt or loffah sponge, please don`t use theirs. For the short time that you`re going to be there just use your hands or, if they have given you a face cloth use that. Whatever you do, just don`t defile your host's articles by scubbing your hairy ass with them especially if you don`t know if it`s their facial hand mitt.

Deep Thoughts...